Our newfound buddy that we chill with has this stupendous houseboat. It's kindof ridiculous how big and nice it is; it's actually nicer than the inside of most homes, hahaha. Anyhoo, I was out getting my jetski (plus sound effects) on, catching some air, climbing and swimming through big rocks, sliding, and especially mastering the art of the intertube. See, here's proof that I was on that thing! Ol' boy was trying soo hard to knock me off of it, but I am a beast. I was triumphant, but ehhh, next time I'm going to wear a wet suit. My poor thighs are beat with water friction burn. Ow. Note to self: when tubing with "Woody" driving, always wear a wetsuit. That mofo is crazy on a boat. Unfortunately, there had to be one bitch who was crazier, and this time it wasn't me. This chick that my friends and I happen to know is probably the most "woe-is-me" acting person alive. She says she hates everyone and everything, but then doesn't see why the people who are actually close to her get frustrated with her. To continue: The whole time we were there she had been giving me this yada about how she's so different now, how she doesn't drink, or smoke pot, just cigarettes, and how she's changing, blah, blah, blahh, blahh-bullshit! Three hours later, there she is drunk as fuck, topless, and passing out wet in someone who she just met's bed. Well, my ex-roomie and Betch and I had to go. It was getting dark, and we all wanted to head home. My ex-roomie and I tried multiple times to wake up miss "woe" but she wasn't having it. We went to the extent of pouring some water on her nipples from a half empty water bottle, and all she did was say "fuck you, go away, you're fucking stupid, fuck off". I was officially tired of this behavior since I needed to leave for previous engagements, and decided spontaneously to dump the remaining contents of the water bottle on her face. I said, "There 'ex-roomie' she is awake now. Let's go." Moments later I hear a screaming from a near-by demon, ahhh, "woe" is awake and pised. This crazy slut comes at me topless, screaming, and aims to plant one in my face! Ha-ha.. don't hold your breath, 'cause it definitely didn't happen. That girl was DROPPED, thrown, and chucked on the boat cussing every breath until she was out of sight. I apologized for blood shed, rolled a fatass blunt, and departed. That was pretty much the end to a spectacular boating event. Yayyyyy.
Amo. Over, and out.
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